Guilt

I feel it surrounding me,
Cloaking me,
Crushing me,
like a dark rug.
I am forced asleep
as the guilt rolls in.

A true man is a verb.
An authentic man is a man of action.
Never a delay,
never a doubt.
True faith does not procrastinate like I do.

I feel anger and sorrow.
I gnash my teeth at what I have created.
I do not create, but destroy.
When I Be, I Do.
When I Sleep, I do not.

I am sorry, Master.
To say I love you, is the wrong words to use.
The love is always yours: you always give,
to me.
This sinner.
This one who forgets.
And Sleeps.
But is still restless.

Even though the restlessness is yours too.